I read the books, yeah I watched the film. At the time it seemed alright, then I made the mistake of paying attenetion the second time I read/watched it and realised how agonisingly awful the thing is.
Bella is a Mary Sue, its so blatantly obvious it isn't even funny. Edward is a creepy stalker with anger management issues and mental instability.
The sparkly glittery vampires are so damn invincible i's ridiculous. What happened to the good horror stories when vampires had weaknesses? What is the weakness of a Twilight vampire? Several 'were'wolves, or several other vampires stronger than it. Stupid.
Normal human behaviour is entirely absent from it, any other girl would be freaked out by someone creeping into their room at night to watch them sleep.
And absolutely no one has noticed the deathly hue of grey that is the colour of the vampires' skin. They are basically reanimated dead people. No amount of makeup will hide grey, dead skin thanks.
The Cullens can only come to Forks every hundred years or so, that school's records must be very poor indeed if none of them have noticed the same names pop up at regular intervals.

The second book annoyed me no end. Bella's frantic fretting over Edward's absence was just plain irritating. And the anti-climatic ending of the whole 'saga' was just stupid. As if Meyer was too attatched to all her characters to bear killing them off apart from the one that wasn't very important and nobody cared about.
Bella's convenient shield ability thing was pointlessly stupid, the way it was written suggested bella had no proper brainwaves. (Which is understandable really if you pick out all the stupid/illogical/reckless/non-human behaviour..)

The only character I liked out of the entire series was James, and he got killed off in the first book. Jacob was okay, but then Meyer went and made him obsessed and overprotective with Bella, then made him randomly fall in love with her child before it even existed.
There's another thing, that damned hybrid/mutant thing.

The books state that when a human bcomes a vampire, their bodily fluids turn into the venom crap. Therefore there is no blood left, therefore a male vampire will not be able to ejaculate.
Also, there is no way on this Earth that Edward's sperm would have been able to survive for over a hundred years in a body full of vampy venom. No way.


So, if you want to write a best-seller;
1. Don't bother with research, factual correctness obviously doesn't matter.
2. Don't use properly constructed sentences, a horrendous amount of dialogue and terribly vague descriptions will do.
3. Make sure you have at least three Mary Sues in your book, that way screamy-rabid-teenage-fangirls/fanboys will have something to swoon over.
4. Don't bother including a plot, random none-sensical events and continuity errors are perfectly fine.